My Weight Loss Story… Proves it’s possible

People ask me ALL the time in one form or another “How did you lose all that weight?”  Well, I’m going to share my story. 

I’ve always liked working out, though I do have a tendency to get pretty lazy.   And I love eating healthy food.  But I also love unhealthy food.  Well, I just love food. 

When I was in the USAF, I was in a position where exercise was required, so it wasn’t that hard for me to become motivated, because I always had that one goal in mind… to pass my PT test.  I also had some pretty cool people around me that liked working out as well.  In my mind, they were a challenge to me, because I’m not one who wants to be outdone.  Mind you, I never felt that I was competing with them; they just made me realize that I could be doing better than how I was.  Because of that, I was able to develop a fitness standard for myself that worked for me and actually kept me healthy and in shape. 

Once I left the military however, I hit a slump somehow.  The stress of adjusting to civilian life did not motivate me to care about too many things.  I was busy trying to figure out how I was going to survive.  I would still go running, but I was not paying attention to my diet.  I would eat whatever was around me because for one reason or another I did not care. 

About a year later, I began interacting with someone who soon became a good friend.  I knew he stayed energized and he stayed in the gym.  During one of our conversations, he mentioned that he had trained people in the gym in the past.  He told me a few success stories, and I was immediately impressed.  I shelved this knowledge like the human catalog that I am and stored for future use.  During this time, also, he knew of my desire to lose weight and get fit, but he also knew that I was lacking motivation and was not very serious about my intent. 

Well, one day, a few months later (after having gone clothes shopping and realizing that I went up yet another size), I came back to him and asked him if he was willing to train me.  The first time I asked he said I wasn’t ready.  That’s all I needed to hear.  How dare he and how does he know???  I wanted to make sure he wasn’t right, so I prepared my mind for what was ahead of me in my quest to get fit.  A couple months after that, I asked again.  This time, he said it again, but he added, “Only if you’re serious.  Don’t waste my time.”  I took that to heart.  He instructed me to begin doing cardio and to hit him up in a couple of weeks. 

This takes me to January 2010.  I signed up for membership at his gym and there, we began a personal trainer/trainee relationship.  My very first day, I did not expect it to be so vigorous (he really was serious!!!).  I had not eaten all day and was somewhat dehydrated.  I almost PASSED OUT!!  I know he thought “This woman is crazy!”  I stuck with it because I was determined to get back into the size that I desired to wear.  I continued working with him for the next 12 months!!  It took six of them for me to lose 40 lbs!  I was further amped by my co-workers, family, and friends constantly remarking about the significant changes that I could not notice at first.  After awhile, even I had to admit that my clothes were simply too big for me.  I think I shocked even myself at how serious I had become.  That year consisted of me working out six days a week.  3 days, I ran 5 (and later 6) miles and the other 3 I did cardio and strength training.  I also monitored my eating habits and made sure whatever my intake was did not interfere with my progress.  My story is that I was only exercising 1 HOUR a day and I was able to reach my goal. 

My hope is to inspire others and to show that it is truly possible to develop a healthy lifestyle.  I still thank everyone who helped in this journey.  Because of a few key people, this was not hard.  In fact, it was actually fun.  I got to the point where I looked forward to the gym in the evening and felt bad if I wasn’t able to make it that particular day.  My PT would tell you… I would fight many obstacles (even him sometimes) to get to where I wanted to be.  I’m glad he was supportive of that.

Several things I learned are:

·    It’s VERY hard to do it alone—support definitely helps. 
·    Even if motivation is external, true dedication and desire has to be internal.
·    Persistence and patience over even the toughest obstacles is very necessary.
·    Achieving personal fitness goals happens in small steps—the ultimate achievement is awesome.
·    Tending to your personal well-being is a lifestyle, not a hobby… it’s not temporary, it’s for life!                

The benefits are wonderful.  It feels so good to be healthy.  It feels good to look fit.  It feels good to know that I can tell people that it’s not impossible.  It feels good to know that others have been inspired and look to achieve the same goals knowing they are within reach.  When I first started, I had so many doubts, but I chose not to give into them. 

I’m a firm believer that we are responsible for taking care of each other.  But I also believe that this is tough to do if you are not taking care of yourself first.  Taking care of your health IS taking care of those around you because you can’t help them if you aren’t making it a priority. 

And THIS is why I’m hot!  :-)

It’s Not You, It’s them… Until…

When Maya Angelou first said, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them,” she was not lying!  I swear on everything golden when a person tells you and shows you their character, DO NOT IGNORE THEM!!  We always worry about getting caught in game or catching feelings for someone that is no good for us, but if you don’t take heed to these words, you have a good chance of losing that battle.  I know this for a fact because I’m currently in the process of battling regret over letting someone who did not deserve to get that close to me get THAT close.  That saying, “It’s not you, it’s me” is also true… until you let them get away with treating you less than how you deserve to be treated.  How do you know when that’s happening you say?  I’m glad you asked!  When you find yourself letting someone cross your boundary and make you feel uncomfortable about treating you a certain way, it’s you.  If you have sex with someone you like and you KNOW the feeling is not mutual, it’s you.  If you knowingly let a person TELL you what they want from you and you still continue to pursue more, it’s you.  It’s been me.  And it absolutely suxx when it’s me.

The point is, it doesn’t have to be you.  Every person is born with a personality and between nature and nurture people develop a way of treating people.  So when you first interact with a person, you may or may not be dealing with their actual selves, but in time you will have no choice but to see them for who they are.  Once that happens, you can then choose to decide if this person is worthy of a relationship (however it develops) with you.  I always try to offer my authentic self when I meet people because I don’t believe in lying.  That’s not to say that I reveal everything in the first meeting because I have a broad range of personality and I’m not always sure what people can handle.  I tend to let their personality guide me so I have a good feel of what we are capable of sharing.  This may be me trying to gain some control or perspective of the situation, but so what.  I deserve to know what I am dealing with.  I’ve learned that over time, I’m pretty good about gauging people’s energy and can identify if they are someone I am willing to let in my life.  With this, I am empowered to know that if I willingly let someone into my space, I have to accept my responsibility in the relationship.  Where I get stupid, though, is when my instincts tell me to kick it in high gear and bounce… and I go nowhere.  Red flags are not hard to identify even if you are not paying attention.  It’s those dang cautionary amber flags that can make you take pause and excuse a situation.  Red flags make you realize that you absolutely do not deserve such treatment.  When you’ve come across them, duh, do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars.  When you come across an amber flag, however, you may slow down and become cautious… but don’t pass go until you are sure you are clear on how to proceed.

My whole thought is this: it takes two to tango.  Typically, during the question and answer, or “getting to know you” portion of the relationship, you have to make sure you are gaining the right information to identify how the person fits into your big picture.  If they don’t, then fine, let them go… no hard feelings.  If they do or can fit in, cool, but make sure you take your time to figure out how.  Don’t listen to just what you want to hear, but also what they want you to know and what they are ACTUALLY saying.  If their actions don’t align with what they are telling you, or their vibe is putting you on guard, don’t proceed until you are sure of the message they are putting across.  Don’t get hemmed up over the superficial stuff that won’t actually matter in the long run anyway.  Passing go through a yellow flag without clearing up the concerns tells the person to feel free to treat you how they choose to.  You are worth far more than that.  Put up that stop sign and chill  until they are clear on how best to treat you.  You deserve nothing less.

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Let the Haters Hate

For the past couple of years, I have been hearing the term “hater”… and think it’s somewhat strange that most people seem to think they have one and actually care about who their haters are.  While it’s true that they do exist, I don’t believe that everyone has one.  Well.  Not by the definition that we like to use for “hater”.  There is a difference between being hated on and simply not being liked.  In my opinion… since I’m not sure there is an ‘official’ definition, a hater is someone that {attempts to} weaken another person’s progress just for the heck of it.  Now.  I want you to sit back and think about that.  Why do you think YOU are worthy of someone actually hating on you for no reason?  Because if you’ve given a person a reason to dislike you… from your personality to something you’ve done to the person, then you are simply being disliked for a reason.  Maybe you do have a hater.  Maybe it’s because of something you’ve accomplished that they are jealous of, or just because of that person’s perception of you.  What does that say about you?  Absolutely nothing.  If anything, it says more about that person and how they feel about themselves then it does for you as a person.  So, now you are excited because someone is hating on you for an imperceptible reason?  You find contentment in knowing that something about you disables someone else’s self-esteem?  Now, that says something about you.

Get ya Self-Esteem game up…

This will do two things for you.  First, it will help you identify your strengths and enable you to draw upon them to develop healthy relationships with yourself and with others.  Second, it will make your haters irrelevant.  That is if they exist. And if they don’t, you won’t care.  People who have a healthy sense of self don’t spend time trying to determine if people dislike them for no reason or give too much energy into actually caring about those people.  I don’t like everyone on this planet, and I am sure not everyone I’ve come across likes me.  But I can find better use of the energy that I have than to care about them in the sense that they affect my everyday.  I’m not saying that I don’t possess empathy for their distresses or situations that hurt them.  I just don’t care that they don’t like me.  That’s too much power to give someone! Someone that does not have my best interest at heart does not deserve that power so I don’t let them own it.  Anyways, your time is better spent focusing on the people that love and care about you and doing things that really matter to you.  Make the right things and the right people important and relevant.  Remember that not everyone is going to agree with you or care about things you care about.  That doesn’t make you or your passions irrelevant.  It means they don’t fit into that vision.  You want to be truly happy?  Put your hater blockers on and keep it moving.

Getting Started (3/12/2011)

The first step is getting over the fear.  It’s recognizing that if God ordained your steps, then you are not actually going to fall, even if it feels like it!  When God is telling you to do something, sometimes I think He knows that it may take awhile for us to step up, but when He’s ready for you, those soft taps become hard knocks.  We all know about the hard knocks.  Those are the ones that make us feel uncomfortable and put us in a position where we have no choice but to react.  It’s where our fears will either become verified and take over or we choose to confront them head on and realize they are just illusions.

 

Today, I am going to start writing.  Typing whatever is in my head so that I can smoothly migrate into a blogging lifestyle and pursue dreams.  Today, it’s time to stop letting my dreams remain in my mind and start becoming a part of my real world.  Today, I want to start telling people about how great they are and how important it is to shake the haters off and to realize that your biggest fan is looking you in the mirror every single day.  Learning how to integrate mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual growth and development will help you learn how to create a true and strong relationship with others involving love, care, trust, and respect.  At the end of the day, if you don’t offer these things to yourself, you can’t honestly expect it to be offered by others.